NORMAL. But I don’t feel normal. I feel hysterical. I thought good news would relieve my stress but instead I’m feeling:
- frustrated – if nothing is wrong with me then why the fuck haven’t I been able to get pregnant
- scared – what if my husband is the reason I can’t get pregnant? I love him and I wouldn’t want to have a baby without him. But seriously, I’ve planned on having a family the way other people plan on having a career. What will I do if this can’t happen?
- alone – need I say more?
My CD13 ultrasound is Monday. Joe drops the kids off to the urologist on Tuesday. We’ll have a definitive answer (or lack thereof) on May 7. Please don’t let us be unexplained IF. I don’t even know what that means let alone how one goes about fixing it.