I’m not even going to make up some reason this post is happening in March, since this post was also done on the last day of February 2011. Apparently it takes me three months to get my shit together enough to set up some goals. And each year I seem to push the required time back another three weeks.
Some of our goals that we set actually set us back a bit this year (mostly financial ones) since our family tripled in size and our original plan on staying in our current home for another 3-5 years is no longer feasible. Looking back I’m not sure we could have seen any of this happening. (Yes, maybe you know you’re going to have kids, but we didn’t plan on having three in two years.) So in a lot of ways my need to plan goals for us took its toll on our family financially and made me feel pretty lousy since I had a hard time focusing on much besides the kids.
Financial Goals
We managed to put away a lot more than we anticipated for the kids 529’s thanks to some generous gifts from family around the babies’ baptism and birthday. We also started a 529 savings account for them that automatically takes money out of our checking accounts bimonthly. So it’s a lot easier to put away cash for them when it’s just a little bit at a time.
Our other plan was to pay down 20% of our mortgage and double our savings. Instead we decided to get me a larger vehicle which we paid for outright, finish the basement and add a shed to our property. So our savings stayed put. We paid down 12% of our mortgage when we realized we wanted to try for #3 last October. I wish we would have just kept that money in savings now that we need to come up with so much capital for the new house. But at least we’ll get it back at closing.
House Goals
We did manage to finish the basement, furnish our master bedroom (although that’s actually happening this week, so maybe it doesn’t count) and hold a very successful garage sale. But we didn’t move the perennial garden. And sadly, I lost a lot of beautiful plants because that damn willow tree is so invasive. I’m going to do my best to make it look nice this spring so that the house looks market ready. It breaks my heart to think of what I probably lost in that garden.
Career Goals
I never stopped feeling guilty for staying at home with my kids. And to add insult to injury, I also started getting a little stir crazy. So I went back to work part-time freelancing. At one point I was working on four contracts. What I found is that I don’t have adequate enough help to work that hard. What I also found is that people are willing to work you to the point of exhaustion, shit all over you, muck with your pay and your life and then drop you like a hot potato.
And while all of this was happening, I was stressing my husband out and missing time with my kids. So while I still feel guilty that I don’t contribute financially and while I still feel restless and miss having that part of my identity, I realize that I’m right where I need to be right now.
Mommy Goals
This is the only category I didn’t suck in. I took pics and videos more than weekly, I nursed the twins past my goal, I recorded all of their milestones, I enrolled in swim class and mommy and me, and I went back for my frosties.
This is probably why I did nothing else last year for myself or for my husband. Uh yeah. My kids consumed me. I loved every second. But I definitely lacked balance in my life.
Personal Goals
We ate more steamed chicken and mixed vegetables from our local Chinese restaurant than I care to admit. I made more time for family and friends, but unfortunately they were the wrong family and the wrong friends (something I’ll discuss in more detail at another time). And while I lost all 47 pounds of my baby weight, I will not be rocking a bikini again in my life.
Fitness Goals
I completed three weeks of the C25K, I didn’t run a single race, I did not run with my friends or take spin classes and I only managed to run 59 miles out of my 250 mile goal.
Being active was one of those things that defined me before having the twins. In a lot of ways motherhood has changed what I focus on to my own detriment. In thinking about what I wanted out of 2012, I realized that the biggest thing I need to focus on is balance. Now, how that will work in a year that I am building a house, having a baby and moving, I have no idea. But I plan to try.
